Captain Lee
(Photo credit: Bravo/YouTube)

The Best Captain Lee Rosbach Quotes From Below Deck

Below Deck is full of hilarious characters and fun storylines, making the reality show a goldmine for quotes. Franchise fans love to apply classic quotes from the show to everyday situations, especially among other Below Deck spin-offs. Although many quotes come from many different Below Deck personalities, some of the most popular one-liners are said by fan-favorite Captain Lee Rosbach.

Hailed as the sassiest Below Deck caption ever, Captain Lee has his fair share of one-liners and quotable moments that fans love to repeat even years after he first said them. Let’s took a look at some of the best quotes Captain Lee has said on Below Deck.

“I’m madder than a pissed-on chicken.”

Photo Credit: Bravo/YouTube

“I’m madder than a pissed-on chicken!” was Captain’s Lee way of expressing extreme anger, and we think it’s amazing. Although we have not experienced this firsthand, we certainly imagine that a pissed-on chicken would be pretty, well, pissed. But making us picture such a situation is what makes this line so funny.

Of course, one of the things that Below Deck fans love the most about Captain Lee is that he is a hard-working captain who really cares about his crew. But viewers also love that the captain is funny and relatable at the same time. We are willing to bet that most people have experienced what it’s like to be so mad that your anger can only be conveyed with a ridiculous simile such as this! And, we hope we never experience just how pissed a pissed-on chicken can be.

“Life is like a shit sandwich. The more bread you have, the more shit you have to eat.”

Captain Lee
(Photo credit: Bravo/YouTube)

Speaking of relatability, everyone can probably relate to this quote on some level. Even if we haven’t been able to phrase it as eloquently as everyone’s favorite Below Deck captain, we all understand what he means to some degree. One way to interpret this great quote is that the more you have in life, the more stuff you inevitably have to deal with.

However, just like with his “pissed-on chicken” line, this quote does force us to have some mental images we could definitely do without. Thanks, Captain Lee. We love you though, so we forgive you.

“I’m as serious as a heart attack!”

(Photo credit: Bravo/YouTube)

As we mentioned before, fans love Captain Lee because he is funny yet relatable, and he also runs a tight ship. Although this has led to some cringey moments, Below Deck viewers largely love him for it. This quote is proof of the tight ship that this well-loved captain runs. You have to admit, “I’m as serious as a heart attack” is a pretty funny response to the question “are you serious?!”

As we saw with the chicken quote, Captain Lee loves a simile as much as the next guy. Personally, we cannot think of a better way to express how serious you are than comparing your seriousness to a heart attack. Plus, it makes for a very funny one-liner.

“If you start crying again, I’m gonna have to go get you some cheese to go with that wine you’ve been spouting”

(Photo credit: Bravo/YouTube)

In some ways, Captain Lee acted as the dad of the ship. This is definitely a quote that your dad might say when he was mad. However, we love it because it includes a pun, and we think those are “grate.” (Like cheese? OK, sorry, we will show ourselves out.)

We also know how he feels. Sometimes you just wish you could say stuff like this to people. And if you are a gruff yet lovable ship captain on a popular reality show, sometimes you can!

“We screwed the pooch so many times we should have a litter of puppies running around”

(Photo credit; Bravo/YouTube)

Ah, Captain Lee. Always blessing us with amazing imagery. See, this is why we had to have a whole article devoted purely to quotes from this gem. Of course, “screw the pooch” is an expression that means “to mess up.” By using the term as a pun with a double entendre, Captain Lee, well, pulled a Captain Lee. This closing quote is the perfect example of why he’s so quotable and why fans love his one-liners so much.

TELL US – WHICH ICONIC CAPTAIN LEE QUOTE DID WE MISS?

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