It’s time for Little Women: LA to take their giant barrel of issues up north – to Alaska! But when the trip Terra Jole arranged suddenly includes her nemesis, Christy McGinity Gibel – per Tonya Banks’ invitation – Terra decides to make everyone’s life miserable. So, business as usual!
But first we begin at Briana Renee and Matt Ericson [Grundhoffer’s] house, where they’re fretting over baby Maverick’s sleep issues. He doesn’t have sleep apnea, but he does need extra oxygen at night – which is tough to do with a clunky mask. Luckily, Briana’s anxiety has lessened. But now she feels bullied by the girls, who almost all piled on her about her – um – funky smell. (Gah! Again, are we really witnessing this nightmare on TV?!?!) Briana says that Terra is the main bully, but the others aren’t far behind. Only Jasmine Sorge has her back. Matt flexes his douchiness muscles, begging Briana to let him “unleash” on them. “Take the handcuffs off me and let me tell them how it is!” he demands. Briana dumbly shrugs, secretly loving the idea of a Big Matt Attack.
Jasmine is at home, where Chris tells her his good news: The railroad has offered him a position! Only downside is that he’ll work nights, which means less time with her and the kids. “We’ll miss you,” sighs Jasmine, wanting to be supportive, but scared of what this new schedule will mean for their family.
At a bookstore, Tonya and Terra check out books on Alaska – because, surprise! That’s where Terra wants to take everyone on a couples’ trip. Tonya’s not into being cold for a week, but she’ll go. Are ALL the girls invited, though? Nope. Christy is not welcome. Terra does feel badly about her issues with Briana over the “fierce” nonsense, even if Briana never writes that damn book she’s blathering on about. She hopes the trip will be a “life changing moment” for them to start new. Tonya wonders how Terra can talk about wanting a new start if she’s still stonewalling Christy, though? Terra’s like, “I HATE HER.” So, no gray area there.
At lunch, Terra meets Briana to discuss the fierce-fight. She wants Briana to live her dreams and makes no apologies about going for her own. She does apologize for “stealing” fierce from Briana, unbeknownst to her (so she says). In the name of transparency, Terra drops the following bomb: She bought “LittleFierceMama.com.” Briana’s like, WTF!?!? Then Terra follows up by offering the domain name to Briana so she can protect herself. Although she’s skeptical of Terra’s intentions, Briana does feel grateful for the gesture. She also agrees to go on Terra’s Alaskan adventure because, hey – you can act like a passive aggressive idiot in a parka just as well as you can in a #RideOrDie tank top!
At Tonya’s house, Christy pops by to discuss Todd’s recovery and – more to the point – drama with Terra. Tonya admits that Terra’s Alaska trip doesn’t include her, but Tonya extends the invite anyway. Christy can’t stand Terra, Terra’s mouth, and Terra’s bullying behavior. But she is willing to go to Alaska in the name of having fun with Todd as part of his new lease on life. So, she’s in. Let the horror unfold…
Unaware of the recent addition to her trip, Terra packs while Joe Gnoffo hints that they’ll have lots of sex in Alaska. Eww. Can this please be the end of that conversation? Moving on to Briana, Terra says she wants peace. But Joe snarks that there will never be peace with these broads. Angry, Terra shouts that Joe needs to TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY!!! But Joe’s not new here. He knows as well as Terra does that drama makes the money machine work. He can’t take her “give peace a chance” speech seriously. So, he’ll believe it when he sees it.
Back at Briana’s, we find out that Maverick’s sleep has improved (yay!) and that Matt has apparently oiled his hair into place again. He’s pleased to hear about Terra’s gesture with the website, but his purple face still looks like it wants to “unleash.” He agrees to go to Alaska because – why not? It’s not like they have a baby struggling with health issues here to attend to. GAWD.
Jasmine and Chris are on board with the trip as well, especially since his job doesn’t start until after the trip is over. In tears, Jasmine expresses how much she’s appreciated having him home. She wants him to be fulfilled in his career, but worrying about their new arrangement is natural. What isn’t natural is the segue to a video that Elena Gant has sent Jasmine of Terra doing some sort of low rent PSA on not using the word “midget.” The video then links to a clip from Christy’s spoof song which uses the word, further antagonizing the situation between Terra and Christy – and, now frankly, everyone. LET THIS SH*T GO, Terra! Dang, woman.
Terra, Briana, and Tonya land in Alaska with their hubbies, with Jasmine, Chris, and Elena (sans Preston) arriving later. Tonya can’t believe Terra posted that video just before the trip, nor can Elena or Jasmine. In their room, Christy and Todd discuss how relentless Terra’s attack has been, and how they should respond. Their plan? Give Terra plenty of rope and watch her hang herself. No need to argue with a lunatic.
The whole group gathers to ride a tram 2,000 feet up to have drinks and drama on a mountain top! As soon as they get to the top, Elena confronts Terra immediately: Why did she post that ridiculous video? Terra keeps claiming she’s “offended,” but her timing is just so suspicious. Joe boorishly backs Terra up, but Elena points out the obvious. It’s too much, too far, and too petty. She thinks Terra needs to just STOP. But as she should know by now, Terra is as unstoppable as one of those trams with cut brakes. She’s on a mission to destroy Christy, period.
After the men step to the side, the ladies sit down for their first group brawl discussion. But Terra isn’t present yet, so some real talk can occur first. Tonya asks Christy if she’s having fun, which is much like asking a captive animal if it’s enjoying its cage. Christy shrugs, cueing the tense discussion ahead. Jasmine says Christy’s video should be left in the past, which all of the others agree with – all except Terra, of course. Jasmine thinks Terra needs to apologize for amping up this video mess, but Tonya (ever Terra’s wing woman) delusionally defends her friend.
Uh oh. Here comes Terra! Jasmine immediately confronts her about the video post, which Terra basically defends as free speech. Christy thinks Terra is a hypocrite, and everyone else pretty much agrees. But the real issue here is this: Christy was never going to sign that book release, and Terra knew it. So she devised a way to lash out at her and now seeks to destroy her character at every opportunity out of revenge. The joke may be on her, though, because 99% of the women at this table are sick of Terra and her manipulative ways. Today it’s Christy in her cross hairs, but tomorrow it could certainly be one of them – and they know it.
As it dawns on Terra that the group is slowly turning on her, she freaks out. And I mean, FREAKS OUT. Like, cat-in-a-hot-bath freaking out. Wow. Despite Tonya’s plea for her to calm the eff down, Terra decides going full-tilt ballistic is the more appropriate move at this juncture!
Next thing you know, Terra’s got her finger in Jasmine’s face, screaming her head off about the horrors of ALL THINGS CHRISTY! Jasmine’s like, SHUT UP. Then she finally forcibly removes Terra from the table so her head doesn’t explode all over their snacks. Tonya even comes over to physically restrain her because – seriously! – someone is going to fall off the side of this damn mountain. And if it’s Terra, I’m not sure anyone would be all that concerned. (What was that about Terra hanging herself with her own rope? Yeah. I think Christy & Todd were prophetic.)
TELL US: IS THE GROUP FINALLY TURNING ON TERRA? WILL SHE EVER STOP COMING AFTER CHRISTY?
Photo Credit: Lifetime
